Changes

Sometimes, we think our issue is because of the external factors.

But, for things to change in our external word, maybe you need to check what is going on with you internally?

Are you happy when you are with yourself? Sometimes, we are so focused on future possibilities that we fail to check in with ourselves in this present moment.

And we keep telling ourselves that we will be happy if….

✨i get the job

✨when he/she loves me back

✨its perfect

✨if i get the car that i want

✨if i earn millions

But, what if you don’t get them?

So, you are not happy?

See, basing our happiness on external factors won’t fill you up.

While we enjoy the good and luxurious things, basing our happiness on them is not entirely the answer.

Even if you change partners, look for new jobs, transfer to new locations, move out, you will be bringing yourself with you. It’s like attempting to change the image of the mirror without changing the one being reflected on. 💕

When you see something in your external world, check internally.

Did you ever notice whenever there is a problem…. you are always involved?

Because, you are part of the problem. And part of the situation and unless we take full responsibility instead of blaming it on other people… there wont be change.

Shit does hit the fan. I make mistakes all the freakin time! But, I don’t beat myself up for weeks or years and torment myself whenever I make a mistake. I suck it up. Laugh about my stupidity. Own it. Change it.

That is your power. Don’t give it to the externals.

“The results of the intervention depends upon the inner condition of the intervenor.” – Bill O’Brien

Our outer world reflects our inner world 🌎.

For things to change in your life.. it does require effort. You do not get it overnight.

Sometimes you get it, sometimes you don’t. One day you totally get everything, the next day you get confused.

But, you do your best and be present anyway.

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A1 Ko ba Kung bakit type kita

If you knew me way back in High School, you can see me buying every song hits, making every mix tape (until Id save up and buy their latest CD – I have a complete set, but I kind of let go of it at one point in my life when I tried to reinvent myself), id buy every magazine with them in the cover (and me and Emel Joy would scream and take turns in kissing the cover) cause we fangirl like that. And everytime my girl group in HS *kaway kaway mona phoebe ellen rachel matet* would dance at parties, we would always dance a1 songs. Kabuang! Hahaha

But then, I eventually changed genres during college from Alternative Rock to Punk/Pop/Rock/Emo music pa. Hello, the used, dashboard confessionals, simple plan etc etc.

When I heard they were coming, I was delighted! And im like: Omyglurb! God is making them come here in Davao na! He sure does makes my desires come true… sometimes it’s not instant and sometimes the feelings kind of fade of whether I still want to or not.. and well, I thought out of sight, out of mind.

I had mixed emotions, and I impulsively bought the meet&greet ticket. I have outgrown their songs actually. I tried listening to them again and it does bring memories of me and them. But, not the same fangirling feeling I had when I was in High School.

I was cool, calm and collected. Totally in control of my emotions.

But, I took the chance in buying tickets and gidamay nako ang household and ate Pangging 😂and Lady Bam.

Because, Carpe Diem! I dont want it to be another missed opportunity. It was so close, and then I would choose not to? So, yeah.

Venus retrograde sure is at work because they were my boyfriends during high school! *ayaw na mo palag. Sila lang ang boyfriends na pwede ishare hahaha altho sa una di ko ganahan ishare sila*

I’d imagine it was them singing those ballads for me. Mark was my ultimate crush(however I didnt want to be at the side sa photo haha I shook his hands tho! (Kay good girl kaayo ko the events guys told us to be professional no pushing, no hugging, no kissing, no selfie – but a lot stole kisses, hugs and selfies man oi! Pero di ko ganahan mangawat chos! Hahaha) So professional lang gyud.

Anyway, reconnecting with my ex boyfriends when I was in High School sure was a gem. All memories came back when they sang their first song! Ughhhh!!

Thank you dear God for the experience. You are the best! How does it get any better than this?

October 23, 2018

Haunted

I used to have a very toxic relationship.

One built with many lies and loopholes and whenever I express my feelings I get called off and dismissed as “ma-drama”. To my close friends who knows me, I may be crazy(in a good way.. thin line between genius and that crazy) and have bouts of drama but only when the going gets tough and with valid reasons. And I have often asked for feedback and they all tell me I only have those episodes once a year at least. (Where hormone peaks and the planets are in retrograde)

So, back to relationships….

How can you dismiss someone who expressed a feeling in a respectful manner and just dismiss it like that?relationships are supposed to be for communication, and overtime my call for open communication was always met with slammed doors and silence.

And, Id end up thinking I was this bad person for having been “madrama” when in truth those questions were really valid and necessary in relationships.

It is funny, how one would enjoy twisting the relationship for them to look good.

But, I know Ive been honest and authentic with how I dealt with the person from day 1. No deception. No lies. Nothing. Na-da.

I have my own contribution to the relationship as well. Number one for allowing the person to continue the emotional play and manipulation.

I call it manipulation because its not the usual relationship.

Google: Catfish

I gave my best but the best is useless when the other end is not authentic and real. ❤️

Just a few reflection brought to you by Venus retrograde which makes one reflect on previous relationships. And what one has learned.

I am choosing differently.

And you, whoever you are… I hope you truly get what you deserve. And I am sure you are getting just that.

I have totally released you to the Divine, no need to control or the need to get back or get revenge(It never crossed my mind). I was angry and wanted to lash out during those times but it got all drained with the remaining 2 years where it was strained and complicated already. To the point I cannot feel anything at all.

And this year, I an grateful to God that finally I was able to feel again. That, why hello dormant heart…. you are slowly waking up from your sleep and recovery.

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Worth it Ang Tanan

Yesterday, we had our Prosperity BEHT event and we were overwhelmed with the presence of supporters and clients who were willing to undergo the therapy.

I, for one am very clear what this is for. It is to help each one clear them of their blockages but at the same time on a grander point of view it is to help clear and anchor the energies of the Earth.

Got my confirmation we were doing good with the intensity 5 earthquake that was felt throughout the city. It was the earth’s manifestation of the coming changes what with the coming new moon. Followed by a heavy downpour of rain cleansing everyone.

Then, while waiting for the next batch (we thought there would be) I laid down on the mat to just rest a bit but Zai came and did crystal reiki on me, while ate Pang also came to do BEHT for me. Which was an awesome experience.

After the session, Ate Pang told me, God has a message for you and she was giggling and smiling. And, I was like what did you see? (I sure hope it wasnt my fantasy hahahahahahaha!!! J/k)

But, she told me:

God has seen your promises and how you do your best to fulfill them. Youve done enough, dont push too hard. God has seen what you have written, and He will honor those just give Him your heart and He will take care of the rest. Give me your heart, God says. ill take care of it and you’ll be surprised how easy it will be. There are more things coming for you, so take it easy.

I am so happy and blessed to hear those words. I literally just surrender my life to God, I have no plans whatever, I just take whatever God gives in front of me and alchemize it 😍 transmute everything around me. Love the one in front of me.

Though, I recognize I have bad days, but, the last time I had a breakdown was december of last year… I guess Im moving just fine for now….

Lord, just guide me… and help me be more compassionate to everyone around me. And less of my snappy retorts if I get irritated 😂😂

Thank you for giving me a great tribe in Mystique Angels and ACIM and of course my DXN colorful Family. ❤️

And new found friends or friend*winks*

✨😇

Full Sturgeon Moon

What a lovely moon, and it gave me early treats.

I am so grateful to God for always supporting me in my journey. And always giving me extra nudges and snippets whenever I really needed them.

This full moon is your message for me to love myself, and to be gentle with myself for where I am right now.

Thank you dear God for helping me create my team in DXN. It is a dynamic cast of wonderful individuals committed to elevate their lives, first to You… and then in this world.

Thank you dear Lord.

I love you always.

K

Retrogrades and all

Last year, 5 planets were in retrograde at this month and this year there are 5-6 almost all of them since the beginning of the year and they have all met this august.

But, I am more grounded and focused and I have veered away from relationships that does not serve me. (A previous love also made contact to me, and I just have to smile at the thought. And no, its not what you think. He is already married, so deffo out of the equation. But, I handle the reconnection well and there were no hard feelings anymore. I can say, I have healed.)

And everything is just so good.

With a whole lot of surprises too! God has been spoiling me this month, what with the honoring of our company. I’ve been reading myself tarot the past month and I just remembered as I am writing this there was one about recognition. But, I chose to ignore that because you know what? I truly do not know in what area would I be recognized.

This month, Dr. Rajesh came and we met again. 7 months after we met way back in Los Cabos and told me I need to take the leadership. As to how it looks like. I do not know. One thing for sure they want my status to level up and my golly I have been working for it. (heavens, help!!)

But, they recognized me as the image of the future generation, the next generation of network leaders in the company. And, while I am honored, I know there’s more work up ahead. But, that’s life. I have given my life for this.. and so, I gladly submit. ❤️✨💕

To where this shift takes me…….

may I be of light heart and mind….

but there’s peace and there’s excitement and looking forward to the next step.

And all is well.

Love,

K